How Group Work Rewrites the Narrative of Our Lives

When God created the world, He did so in the form of a story. He authored a cohesive narrative, with Himself as the lead and humanity playing supporting roles. In the beginning He walked with man in the cool of the day, offering interpretation—helping us make sense of what our eyes saw, our hands touched, our hearts felt. 

These divine interpretations were not meant to be commentary, however; they were meant to give us direction as we journeyed through our individual stories with our Creator. What this tells us is that we don’t live out of isolated facts—we live out of interpretation. We live out of the story we believe about our lives. Our thoughts, emotions, behaviors, and values are embedded in our stories- never disconnect from them.

Story: The Lens of Our Lives

Post fall, we still live out of what we believe about God and who we think we are to Him, yet it’s been tainted–distorted. 

Our beliefs are deeper than we imagine and are formed sooner than we think. A distant, cold God in our narrative can lead to us becoming performers—ashamed of failure or proud of success. A God too busy can turn us into burdens, afraid to speak up for fear of bothering Him. The fall out continues to flow over into the ways we relate to people. The ways we learn to keep ourselves safe relationally are directly connected to the lens through which we see the world.  These things are the background music we have always lived with, making them hard to recognize; yet our feelings and actions indicate specifically how the fall has impacted us. 

These are the ways evil has partnered with our broken hearts, embedding itself into our stories and subtly shaping the way we see life.

Relationships: The Theater of Transformation

God designed relationships to be conduits of His truth and grace. As the Apostle John writes, “No one has ever seen God; if we love one another, God abides in us…” (1 John 4:12). We need one another to see God clearly. When we love, we reveal God’s story of redemption. When we sin against each other, we distort that story.

This shaping begins early. A mother’s tone, posture, and attentiveness mold a child’s view of themselves and the world. A gentle “no” can communicate love; an angry “NO!” can send a message of shame. Relationships, for better or worse, shape our hearts.

Yet, in community, God begins to restore what has been broken through relationships.

Rewriting the Story 

By his grace, we are able to rewrite our narratives! Not by ignoring the past, or downplaying the pain, but by naming the brokenness before the face of the Father. As we encounter God in our past and present stories, the facts of our lives begin to shift in meaning. Strongholds are broken, freedom is found. And one of the most powerful tools God uses in this redemptive process is group work.

Group Counseling: A Conduit of Grace

I run a group called Storied Lives- a group for women interested in exploring patterns in their present struggles. Through the writing and sharing of early stories in a group setting, we come out of hiding and begin to hear what God wants to say to us about our stories. 

I have learned that groups harness the power of both story work and relationships to foster deep transformation. Unlike individual therapy that may be content-heavy, process-oriented groups focus on how change happens in and through relational engagement.

While content targets knowledge; process targets presence. It can feel similar to the difference between reading about Jesus and experiencing His presence. In groups, the process—the relational vulnerability and presence—embeds the truth of the gospel into our hearts.

Incarnational Change: Being Jesus to One Another

Allow me to expand on these two aspects: Story work and relational vulnerability. 

Incarnating Jesus to One Another

Group members bring their honest, raw, vulnerable stories of trauma, rejection, betrayal, abandonment, loneliness—and allow others to step into that pain with them. These are not stories told from a safe distance. They are read at ground zero, in a first person narrative. 

In group, we sit together in sorrow and solidarity. We cry together, feel together, see each other—and in doing so, incarnate Jesus to one another. We reflect the Christ who sees us, hears us, knows us, and still loves and accepts us.

As our stories are met with compassion instead of judgment, their meaning begins to change. What was once a story of shame becomes a story of covering. What was once loneliness becomes belonging. What was once disgrace becomes delight.

Speaking Truth into Lies

A group like Storied Lives brings healing by helping us name the lies our stories are built on. It is a gift of God that we can’t see our own face. We need one another to rewrite these stories. 

We live by unconscious beliefs: “I’m too much.” “I don’t matter.” “I have to prove I'm worth being around.” These lies form invisible scripts that drive us. But in group, others help us name them and bring them into the light.

By simply showing up, by sharing our weaknesses and receiving others’, we begin to fight the lie that we are alone or that we have nothing to offer. In real time, we are offering something of value to another, we are not alone in those stories anymore. Our very presence is an act of resistance against isolation, shame, and fear.

This is spiritual transformation. It’s learning to live in the Resurrection. We are not waiting until we are finished to apply techniques, our brains and hearts are changing together in the present moment.

A Microcosm of the Kingdom

Group work is a microcosm of the Kingdom of God. Where God’s face was once dimly lit in our past, we now see Him more clearly through each other. Through shared tears, truth-telling, and compassionate presence, our distorted stories are rewritten.

Together, we taste and see the goodness of the Lord—in the land of the living. Together, we learn what it means to live not out of lies, but out of the truth of our creational beauty and redeemed identity.

In group, we practice for life beyond the safe space together. We carry the experience of grace and truth out into our friendships, marriages, families, and churches. And in doing so, we bring the kingdom of God closer, one redeemed story at a time.

Author’s Note: If you’ve ever felt like you’re stuck in a story that no longer serves you—one marked by shame, fear, or isolation—consider stepping into the sacred space of Storied Lives. It may be the very place where God begins to write a new chapter.